"I'm moving out"

Posted on September 5, 2011 

Grown-up son finds place of his own! Yes!

So Dan and I were at Harry’s, waiting for our lunch to arrive, and he leaned forward and said, “I’m moving out. Three of my buddies and I have found a place.”


My first reaction was, predictably, a little bit of shock. I really had no idea he was planning to move out.


But my second reaction was, “Yes!” Just that morning he’d made me angry by giving snarky, snippy answers to my questions. Once again I had vowed not to speak to him any more than was necessary because I didn’t deserve to be treated as though I had no sense. Several times during the summer I had been on the precipice of changing the locks and kicking him out. Darn, he beat me to the punch.


You see, I have no qualms about letting people move on when they have to. It’s all part of life. I think everybody needs to have that thrill of finding a place of their own and moving into it. I still remember how, when I got my first apartment in Lexington, I looked around the living room and started jumping up and down and chanting, “Mine! Mine! Mine!”


Dan was getting too complacent living with me, and I suspect he knew that. He often said he knew he needed to move out, and I said it a lot, too. We get along OK, but we do need to get away from one another. It’s time. It’s more than time.


I started counting all the good things that would come out of this move. Yes! No more ice-cold house with the air conditioner turned way down low. Yes! The remote is mine, all mine! Yes! No more football and Sportscenter and The Herd with Colin Cowherd when I want to watch Chopped or The Price is Right or Judge Judy. No more shoes blocking my hallway (Dan has more shoes than I do). I’ll probably see my utility bills go down, especially the water bill – Dan likes to take long showers. No more snide remarks about sitting at the computer all day – it’s the way I work now. Assignments come in and articles go out while I am at the computer. I’m not just “sitting there.” I’m really working. Yes! Now I will have more room in my garage. And yes! I’ll have a whole extra room to do something cool in.


Of course, some of it is sad. This will be the first time I have been in my house with neither puppy boy or real boy. It’s going to be real quiet. But there will be a fun new dimension to my relationship with Dan. We’ll meet for lunch and we’ve already planned to see Peter Pan and the Bodies Revealed exhibit at Lexington Center, and we want to take a cruise together in December. And I can go to Vegas for a weekend without guilt. I’m cool with this move. I really really am.


And the best part of it all is that Dan is confident he will be able to pay his part of the rent himself! YES!

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