Of all the versions of Cinderella that Disney could have updated, how on Earth did they settle on this one?
Directed by Kenneth Branagh and scripted by Chris Weitz (About a Boy), this is stately and sumptuous, but dull and never ever delightful.
The Disney instinct, spurred by Tim Burton's blockbuster success with Alice in Wonderland, was sound, although following Into the Woods into theaters this closely is clumsy. The studio ignored the Rodgers & Hammerstein musical from the 1950s and forgot its own mildly amusing cartoon musical from the same era, going for a Cinderella full of back story and behind-the-scenes scheming. They gave the reins to Branagh, and he treated it like his many Shakespeare adaptations. No expense was spared for amazing costumes and lush, baroque sets. He even found a part for Derek Jacobi, his Hamlet/Henry V/Much Ado About Nothing good luck charm.
But Branagh has delivered a lovely corpse of a fairy tale, not helped by a blandly pretty lead (Lily James) and even blander Prince Charming (Richard Madden).
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Cate Blanchett makes a vile but underplayed evil stepmother. The simpering stepsisters (Sophie McShera, Holliday Grainger) barely register.
Things perk up in this overly familiar story, which begins before "Ella" lost her mother (Hayley Atwell) and father (Ben Chaplin), only when the Fairy Godmother shows up. Helena Bonham Carter threatens to energize this the way her Red Queen juiced Alice in Wonderland. But even she's a "bippity, boppity boo" short.
The look is always spot-on, the transformation effects, pumpkin-to-carriage, etc. — are perfect. But the pre-teen girls this is intended for have a right to expect more laughs, broader villainy and more fun.
This time out, the glass slipper doesn't fit.