I have such a nice son. He’s made my New Year’s resolution for me. For 2011, he has resolved to drag me, kicking and screaming, into the 21st century.
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He thinks that because I don’t have a cell phone, I am hopelessly mired in the past. Also because I don’t have a DVR or tivo or any of those other modern gadgets. He thinks I’m a fuddy duddy. I don’t think I’m a fuddy duddy. Hey, I have a Facebook page. I have a digital camera and I know how to download the photos. I’ve synced my iPod Shuffle myself. I have CDs and DVDs and I’ve almost got my DVD player to work. I am with it!
Truth to tell, all this technology is moving much too fast for me. I just need a little space and time to get used to it. It overwhelms me sometimes to think about things like how much you can do with a cell phone. Take pictures, make videos, send e-mails, start your car remotely – oh, and make a phone call, too. Do I really need a device that does all that? My landline phone just sits there. It doesn’t dance or sing or order pizza for me. And I like it like that.
Part of it is I don’t want to get caught up in all the high-falutin’ high-tech craziness going on. I like things simple. I don’t think an iPhone, an iPad or any other gadget beginning with a lower-case vowel will simplify my life. It’s just that much more to keep up with. And I don’t feel I need to be in constant touch with anybody.
Another part of it is a cautious aversion to getting too dependent on these innovations. What if the satellite grid fails again – remember it happened a couple of years ago, and nobody could use their cell phone? What if we overload our circuits and lose everything in a blaze of electronic glory? What would happen then? (Like that scene in Independence Day, where they had to resort to Morse code to get a message to the armies assembled against the aliens.) What if all our gadgets suddenly became like HAL in 2001: A Space Odyssey?
I’m just saying.