Letters to the Editor

What lies ahead

Imagine presidential debate No. 1, assuming Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton are the nominees:

Commentator: “Mr. Trump, what is your policy on the Iraq/Syria conflict?”

Donald: “Hillary’s a liar (as he points his finger at her). Liar Hillary, liar Hillary!”

Hillary’s response: “Donald, name-calling is very childish.”

Donald: “See I told you (as he pulls down his trousers) she’s a liar. Does that (as he points to his crotch) look like a child’s ding-dong?”

Hillary: “Donald, there’s an old saying, ‘it’s not the size that counts, it’s …”

Donald interrupts: “See, I told you she’s a liar. Size does count (pointing to his crotch). Two of our army battalions outnumber the entire ISIS forces.”

Commentator: “So, Mr. Trump, you are going to send in ground troops to Syria and Iraq?”

Donald: “I didn’t say that; Hillary did. She said size doesn’t matter, and I think I’ve refuted that point quite eloquently. Liar Hillary, liar Hillary.”

Hillary: “I never said I would send or not send ground troops into Syria or Iraq. I’ve said …”

Donald interrupts: “I told you she’s a liar. If she does or doesn’t send in troops, she has now just lied. My logic is irrefutable.”

Hillary: “What?”

Commentator: “Let’s go to the next question.”

Robert Hoeller