Rev. Sen. Al’s values, Book of Matthew blesses charters

Something inspires the only cow of late

To think no more of a wall than an open gate,

And think no more of wall-builders than fools.

— Robert Frost, “The Cow in Apple Time”

I expect you are a little tired of me quoting Robert Frost all the time, but you all quote the Bible and the Koran to me. It’s only fair. I’m not sure what the Bible says about building walls. I do seem to remember that a good enough trumpet player, maybe like those Mariachi ones in Mexico, caused walls to crumble down. I don’t care how many walls that President Donald Trump builds or how high they are, Americans will still figure out a way to get out of here.

I’ll bet the Rev. Sen. Al Robinson, R-London, God’s point guard, could give me a book report on whether the Bible likes walls or not, if he could just carve the time out of his busy schedule of attacking American values in the name of something that seems to get him re-elected.

Show me some foolish legislation and there on it is the name of wise old Al. A couple weeks ago he was behind a law that would seem to prohibit a teacher from making a kid in school sit down, quit testifying, quit laying on hands on the girls, quit glossolalia and quit soul winning in Algebra class. That law allows religious expression in school and a kid from some terrorist religion is perfectly free to pronounce his beliefs too, but had better watch it in the lunchroom.

Another thing Al’s law has put on schools is that clubs and groups in school could exclude queers, as well as L’s, G’s, B’s and T’s. That will require a little Board of Inqueery to decide for the kid who wants to get in 4-H whether he is gay or not.

Without a lot of sexual history, one would hope, at that age, a kid too good with colors and real sensitive, about whom there have been rumors, could only prove he was straight enough for 4-H by going out and having sex with somebody of the opposite one and recording it on the cell phone to show the committee.

We now have charter schools, but because we all went to regular school, we do not know what charter schools are. They may be about basketball, a popular sport in Kentucky, but are more than likely another form of wall. Right now, aristocracy kids with money in their pockets, Camaros and good clothes are being exposed at an alarming rate to riff-raff from the holler or the ’hood, and are held back from learning by slow readers who will cut you.

We will just take some of that extra money that school districts have and turn it over to private companies. This is all according to the Book of Matthew.

As usual, the legislature lets public policy be dictated by the unfortunate families of crime victims, who invariably appear and beg the General Assembly to put to death all offenders who ever do anything close to what they have had to put up with. There used to be legislators both strong enough and principled enough to moderate such laws, but it seems hard to find a legislator with both strength and principle, and so we have had a session of increased penalties.

For a while it looked like, and they may still do it, that the attorney general would lose his appeal, rights. By the way, who is the attorney general now and why don’t we hear from him? Would it be asking too much for him to get on television every once in a while and promote something?

This story was originally published March 25, 2017 at 12:31 PM with the headline "Rev. Sen. Al’s values, Book of Matthew blesses charters."