Our Voices: For the Latinx community, ‘law enforcement’ can mean fear, intimidation

When I was six years old, my family and I moved from Aguascalientes, Mexico to the United States. I always knew I was different.

This was mainly because of my skin color, language, and lack of citizenship documentation. Another big thing that distinguished me from everyone is that growing up; unlike my peers, I never felt safe or protected by any form of law enforcement. Growing up in the U.S. as an undocumented child meant that calling the police was never a choice for when I needed emergency assistance. Back then this sometimes included being asked for a social security number as soon as the police arrived on site of any accident or crime. Growing up in Kentucky as an undocumented person meant fearing that at any moment of your life you could stumble upon la migra. La migra is a Spanish slang term for the Immigration and Customs Enforcement, also known as ICE.

As a child, I didn’t quite understand what being undocumented meant. This all changed around 2011, when I was just 11 years old and in the 6th grade. When I was in elementary school my father became a single father of two. My dad made it his mission since then to never miss a single day of picking my brother and me at our bus stop. One day in April of 2011, I had arrived at my bus stop, eager to see my father after a long day of school; I stood up from my seat and searched for him through the bus window. I noticed he wasn’t there and it was very strange.

Looking back at it now my gut knew something was wrong that day. Instead of my father, I was awaited by a family friend who then proceeded to take me to her house. She sat in this big brown recliner as we waited for my older sister to arrive as well. I remember I kept asking where my father was and why he wasn’t at the bus stop. No one was answering my questions because I don’t think they knew how to explain what was going on to an 11-year-old. As I sat there, I kept hearing many conversations happen between all these people I knew from my neighborhood —like “la migra”, “what are his kids going to do?” “Will they have to go back to Mexico?” or “Should we contact their mother?” “Pobrecitos niños”(“poor kids”). None of this made sense to me at the time. At some point, an adult finally made the decision to inform me about what was happening but they didn’t do a very good job. All I remember from that conversation is some elder lady from our neighborhood telling me that my dad was arrested by la migra and that we would be staying with her until someone else from my father’s job could help us go back to Mexico.

I was really confused because as far as I knew at the time, Mexico was no longer our home. My mother was still in the U.S. so how could we as children leave without her even if she wasn’t technically a part of our lives? How was I supposed to leave all the friendships and memories I recreated in the U.S.? And what in the world had my father done that was so bad and would lead to our deportation? At the time my dad had a worker’s visa; my siblings and I were the only undocumented ones. For about 3 hours from 4 p.m. until 7 p.m. I really thought I had lost my father to La Migra. I thought that I probably wasn’t going to see my father for another 3-6 months. Until we were sent off to meet him in Mexico. For those three hours, I felt lost, alone, abandoned, and betrayed by my father. Even though he had no control over the situation.

Although I can’t give you all the details of the situation and why my father’s workplace was raided, I can say it was a huge misunderstanding in which my dad had no probable cause to be detained by ICE. All of this still led to many years of court hearings and lawyer visits for my family. There were many times from 2011-2016 in which I had to miss school field trips because I was so afraid of the outcome of a court hearing. I was so afraid of the possibility that each day would be the last day I saw my father. There were times that for father’s day each year my dad had to be in a courtroom instead of spending time with his kids.

Now, something that I’ve always wondered from this situation is: how were so many ICE agents able to raid a small supermarket when Lexington doesn’t even have an ICE office? To be more precise, Lexington doesn’t even have an official assigned ICE agent. When reaching out to my district’s council member Jennifer Reynolds about this curiosity she was able to give me the following answer. “What happens is that ICE has the permission to go into our local jail and review the records of who we have held there. There is a desk at the jail that they are allowed to come in and use. They can then come and detain people at the jail if they want and ask that they be put on a 48 hour hold.”

In reality, after that I had no choice but to make myself knowledgeable with immigration laws, policies, and everything else that related to immigration that could ever impact my family and me. Imagine that, an 11-year-old had to learn all this immigration vocabulary because for the rest of her life that 11-year-old will fear being torn apart from her family again. This is just my story, there are many more stories of children, mothers, fathers, and siblings being separated by evil white men that think they will protect their country by traumatizing vulnerable people. ICE’s dirty work has never stopped, no matter who is president. No matter if our nation is blue or red, ICE will continue to damage the vulnerable communities.

Now that I’m 21, I have the privilege to be protected by DACA which stands for Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals. Regardless of what protection I have from being deported, it does not change that as a person of color I will never be treated with the same decency as a white or white-passing person.

As the Gen Zer that I am, I’m not afraid to stand up for what I believe in. I will always speak up for my undocumented/immigrant community. I will always tell about how much Black lives matter because they do. I will always fight for equity and justice that does not discriminate based on your religion, gender, sexuality, or disabilities. Yet I will always be afraid that while fighting for all these things I could be targeted or profiled by a police officer from our beautiful Lexington.

I’m not the only one with this fear. In the past year as the Black community needed all and every support, my family would plead to me to be extra careful at any protest or community event that I attended. Each time I walked out my family home’s door during my sister would give me a bendicion. A bendicion is a blessing a lot of Latinx Families give to others will also give the sign of the cross. They start the cross at the top of your forehead, taking the bottom to the top of your chest, and moving to the sides— left to right. Ending a kiss on the hand of who is giving the blessing. Doing this helped my sister keep peace of mind.

Being arrested is never an easy thing for anyone to experience but it is especially hard for Undocumented/DACAmented folks. This is because if you as an undocumented immigrant get arrested have a much higher possibility of being deported. We have learned that this is what many undocumented immigrants experience in Lexington as our Local police officers continue to work closely with ICE. For someone who obtains a DACA status like me, things can be very different. As far as I know as a DACA recipient I cannot have any criminal record because I could lose my eligibility rights for renewal. Even something that is very common as a DUI can lead to my removal of DACA. Each time I want to participate in a protest with my community I have to think of how high are the chances of me getting arrested for simply expressing my first amendment. Each day before I go outside of my apartment I have to think “how can i make myself look more white? More American?” Because if there is anything that will save me from being removed from this beautiful city is to blend in and be more “white.”

I know many of you want to help and love to ask any question on how you can be a better ally. I’ll leave you with this last thing on how you can support everyone and anyone being oppressed by what we so call our “justice system.” You have the power in your hands, GO OUT and VOTE! Use your voice, by voting in any and all elections. When we don’t have elections, call your governmental officials. Let them know who and what you support. Help us who are being shut down each day by using your own voice!

Edith Cruz is a first-generation immigrant student who attends Bluegrass Community & Technical College, pursuing a double major in Public Relations and Spanish.

This story was originally published August 13, 2021 at 9:21 AM.